Monday, 16 April 2012

The man den

I am not a boastful person, I am not someone who has a lot of things to boast about, or be very proud of. However I am proud of my man den.

What is a man den? I hear you say?

The answer is a safe place, a place of refuge, a haven, a fortress of solitude if you will. My wife will tell you that it's place for all of my crap to live so that the house stays nice and clean. There's a rancor and AT-ST that would beg to differ.

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No matter how hard she tries the wife can't expel my childish ways completely. Here's what I did to my sons alphabet mat when left unsupervised-

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I digress. As I said before the man den is place to retreat to when the stresses and strains of the world become too much. As I like to say, if you've got nothing to do, you'll find something to do in the man den.

Let's go through some of the more prominent features-

Dartboard:

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Your eyes don't deceive you, that's a West Ham dartboard.

Pub paraphernalia:

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Pub signs, wooden table, personalised (sort of) ash tray, and bar towels (possibly stolen).

Bar:

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Ok, so really it's just an extending table that I took a jigsaw to, but have you got one?

Sofa:

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Brown. Leather. A man needs no more.

Pest Control:

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BB gun for tactically removing pigeons from my satellite dish. Night vision goggles for scaring the shit out of the wife once she's gone to bed.

Entertainment unit:

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TV, PS2, and a VHS player in full working order. If you didn't want to you would never need move from the sofa.

VHS library:

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No point in having the vhs player without the library to back it up. When we're all getting the latest films beamed directly to our retinas this will go for a fortune on ebay.

Sound system:

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Alright this is pretty shit, but the den isn't that big. Acoustically it's fine.

Fishing tackle menagerie:

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Hooks, line, reels, buckets, and anything else that might be required.

Poker Table:
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Everyone needs one, no one uses one. One of lifes modern paradoxes.

The only thing that's missing is a shitter. If it weren't for this I'd have my wife send my post up and I could live there.


The writer of this blog is taking part in a ludicrously long charity walk for Asthma UK. If you're feeling generous you can kindly sponsor him here.

By The Man Blog.










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